From Alaska to Santa Rosa de Cabal, Colombia: My Baptism Experience in a New Culture
Okay, let me set the scene for you as to why an Alaskan in his 29th year of life has just now been baptized into the Catholic church in the small town of Santa Rosa de Cabal, Colombia. This idea started in February of 2023 when my girlfriend and I had just returned from a month-long stay in the United States and moved to live in Santa Rosa de Cabal with her parents. As I was in the process of helping with moving and getting situated in a full-time coding boot camp career pivot (more accurately to call), my suegra Gladys (my girlfriend’s mother) came home one day with excitement, saying that they were doing classes to become baptized at what is the largest and grandest church that exists in Santa Rosa de Cabal. Now, from here at this moment and numerous other follow-ups asking me if I wanted to do so, I said, “Si!” I say “of course” because after living in Latin America for nearly two years and planning to have a part of my life based in Colombia or another part of Latin America and additionally wanting to continually grow and evolve my relationship with my girlfriend Valeria, who is Colombian, this had to be done to support her in our relationship and follow through on a desire for her mom to see her daughter married. For this to work, it would be ideal in her eyes to have her daughter marry someone who loves her, has ties, and belongs to the same religion. Religion in her life plays a big part in how she processes and gives meaning to situations. This is the case for many Colombians.
According to the 2020 Report on International Religious Freedom, the U.S. government estimates that 73 percent of the Colombian population is Catholic.
Let’s say roughly 70% of the Colombian population is Catholic. This first came to my attention back in 2021 when I visited Guatemala and visited Antigua, Guatemala. When I was spending time researching the country and learning about one of the biggest and most spectacular processions that take place throughout all of Latin America during the Semana Santa, one of the holiest of weeks in the Catholic religion, it gave me the takeaway of how religion plays an integral part in society throughout many Latin American countries. Religion plays a prominent role in many individuals’ lives. When going through Colombia, it is widespread to see individuals wearing necklaces of crosses, seeing tattoos of symbols to the Catholic Church, seeing construction equipment with a photo of Jesus plastered on the equipment, taking a public bus, and seeing the large image of Jesus in view for all the passengers to see. A common saying I often experienced when I asked how someone is doing in Santa Rosa de Cabal is, “Bien, gracias a Dios.” The person is doing good and thanking God. My girlfriend and I agree that this is why the town we live in and many other towns in Colombia is very safe because numerous individuals live lives tied to morals and values from the Catholic church. This large collective following helps organize society. I like to think of the book “Sapiens” by Yuval Noah Harari and how religion was a primary factor in helping to organize and make it possible for large groups of people to be organized. Many people attend churches throughout Santa Rosa de Cabal, not just older adults but also young people. Santa Rosa de Cabal has a panadería (baker) and an Iglesia (church) on every corner. This is true for many towns in Colombia. A panadería and Iglesias go hand in hand in providing comfort to society and value.
Upon saying yes to my suegra, the wheels were set in motion to go to a class with a Father (well, I thought it was) at the large church in front of the town’s plaza. In my head, I didn’t do any research ahead of time to know what to expect. I treated this entire experience as going with the flow, beginner mindset, how I can find the GOOD throughout this process, and what value I’m adding to my relationship with Valeria. In my head, I thought this baptism would be as simple as me going one time to a church with a local Father here and getting water poured over my head with the Father saying numerous statements out loud. It turns out this wasn’t the case. I never grew up religious. I would occasionally attend a Christmas or holiday service with my family in Alaska or when visiting my family in California when I was little. My idea of what baptism would be came from when I would visit my Dad at the church he attends in Birchwood, Alaska, and how a baptism there consists of being dunked in the water or the lake in the summertime. In my head, a quick process. Well, this was different here in Colombia.
I started my weekly night class with my girlfriend and her mom with five other families with children ranging from several years to their early 20s. It is common for most people in Colombia to get baptized in their first few months of life. In this case, I quickly understood that I would be a far outlier in this process. From the classes I was taking here that lasted only three visits as myself, my girlfriend and my suegra felt the individual in charge of this class needed to be more organized and a better fit for my journey to becoming baptized.
In addition, I had a time frame of needing to get baptized before July of 2023, as this is when my Colombian visa expires, and Valeria and I would be leaving Colombia for the rest of the year. It was customary for individuals to pay the individual teaching this class I was first attending. I don’t know what you would call his position with the church, but in my last class with him, my suegra leaned over and told me that she would find someone better to help get me baptized and not pay this individual.
And that is just what happened. We didn’t pay, and within a week, my suegra talked with the Father, Ilder Andres Gomez Lopez of Parroquia Santa Maria del Monte Carmelo in Santa Rosa de Cabal. Valeria, Gladys, her husband Orlando, and I attended the 10 am service on a Sunday and met with the Father in his office afterward. My family explained that I wanted to get baptized to marry Valeria, and then I had to explain my intentions to get baptized to the Father. This was said to conform with beliefs and know that the Father is baptizing me with good intentions for him, as I’ve come to learn that he wouldn’t consider baptizing me if I didn’t have good intentions. Afterward, he agreed to help with facilitating my baptism, and we then decided that he would baptize me about five months later, in June of 2023, with the agreement that we would meet once a week after attending the Sunday service and discuss topics that he would assign to myself and Valeria to research and learn about.
These topics would consist of learning about the different archangels, different saints in the history of the Catholic Church, Catholic history, a documentary of the current pope Jorge Mario Bergoglio, and the process, symbolism, and history of baptism. From this, these meetings, days and nights, and writing in my journal in Spanish have helped increase my Spanish understanding as I would then have to speak with the Father on these topics. Although often, when communicating with the Father, I typically listen more and talk less as these topics are more challenging to speak of in Spanish. Nonetheless, I’m grateful for this experience in how it has helped strengthen my relationship with Valeria and her parents and another action taken to improve my Spanish, not to mention the Sundays sitting in church and listening to the service only in Spanish.
Let’s fast forward to June 4th, 2023. My family and our two friends, Rodrigo and Alvaluz, escort me. In addition to my baptism that day, three other families were with their daughters of no more than a few months who were also getting baptized. The ceremony lasted about 45 minutes, with the Father speaking about the importance of this baptism and how you are being cleansed of your original sins, welcoming us into the Catholic community, and showing that this is a sign of God’s grace and marks the beginning of a lifelong journey of faith. Let me take a pause and say that I see many positives in this case for the society in Santa Rosa de Cabal with the Catholic religion, but from me doing the act of becoming baptized doesn’t define my relationship with God or how I associate my morals, values, perspectives in how I choose to live my life. I’m respectful of other’s beliefs and understanding, in this case, what a large and main fabric of how society is, and if you want to have more resounding support and acceptance into living in a country, a deeper international relationship, then you need to be respectful and open to how others view life and the customs. I’m proud of my family for helping to support and create this life experience as it has allowed me a deeper understanding of the Colombian culture, the Santa Rosa de Cabal culture, another activity that brings us closer as a family as many times we will go to church on Sunday and then go for long walks and lunch meals outside.
For any extranjero that is in a Colombian relationship and wants it to be serious. It would help if you were involved with the parents as often as possible (so long as they aren’t crazy or negative to be around), as a family is essential. The level of connection is much deeper than in the United States in how often a Colombian woman communicates and is active with her parents. I’m sharing this from my experience with Valeria and her parents and observations. I know if her parents aren’t happy, it will make it very challenging for our relationship to continue growing.
After my baptism was over, we then proceeded to the Sunday service of the church, and numerous times Father Ilder said in front of several hundred individuals attending my church about myself getting baptized along with the other children. He would address me not as a baby (for a good reason) but as Joven (a young person), and that is how an individual is on the spiritual path, even at a later age than what is deemed normal. Another speaker commented on the positivity of myself getting baptized and starting my spiritual journey. Others afterward came up to me to congratulate me. Even one lady told me she was proud of what I was doing and plans on sharing my story with her older children who live in other areas of Colombia as an inspiration or perhaps an example if I was interpreting currently what she was saying.
Many times during the baptism or throughout this process, I am trying to figure out precisely what is going on and understand everything being said because it is in Spanish. I’ve been speaking and listening to Spanish for about 20 months and have yet to become fluent. So often in these moments, I practice mindfulness by observing my breath and thoughts and telling myself I can as a moniker to what I’m doing in life and aiming for. I will accomplish yet no matter the many moments that you need patience. And living in Colombia or other Latin American countries requires lots of patience.
What I have learned from this process
- Our dog Almendra comes to church with us and sings certain songs during service.
- One can accomplish tasks by staying focused on the bigger picture, drawing attention to your breath, and knowing that it is good to be uncomfortable and also comfortable not knowing.
- How religion is of outstanding overall importance in Colombian society, but most of the time, you’re not having conversations about it throughout the day-to-day, and this is healthy in our family relationship as we spend most of the time together going for long walks, eating all of our meals together, joking, commenting on culture in Santa Rosa de Cabal, and just being in the moment.
- The amount of commitment specific individuals make to a belief and how this becomes their one thing in life. I’m referring to the process that it takes to become a Father and how it is a nine-year commitment, and then once you’re a father, your entire life is dedicated to serving the Catholic Church. It showcases the endless iterations of how humans can live their lives, and there isn’t one lifestyle, belief, or perspective that is right for every individual.
Going forward
Now that I’m baptized, we are continually attending church here in Santa Rosa de Cabal, and going forward; I will be working on my first communion. Although I’m sure this won’t occur until Valeria and I return to Colombia in 2024. I also have a life goal that my Father would like to see me get baptized in Mirror Lake in Chugiak, Alaska, as I know this is an essential belief that my Father would like to see me do before he dies. And again, this is another experience I plan on doing for a loved one. Thanks for reading and taking the time to hear my thoughts! Nothing to promote other than following my documentation of life internationally and reinventing myself in the world of software and technology. Gracias por su atención y nos vemos en el próximo artículo.
